Damaged Goods

Men have a hard time admitting their weaknesses. Whether it be physical, mental or, especially, emotional, men like to portray themselves as superheroes, at least in their own minds. These same men, however, are quick to point out the flaws of others including the woman/women in their lives.

Should you reveal too much about your past too soon, and should it include psychiatric evaluations, restraining orders, threats to castrate an ex, or anger management issues, you may be perceived as “damaged goods.”

To live in fear, however, of how someone will judge you is not living, and your past has a legitmate place on the context of a new relationship. Your past is what helped mold you into the person you are today but revealing too much too soon can make a man moonwalk. That is why it’s so important to make sure hearts are healed from an old romance before pursuing another.

Not only do you want to make sure you don’t make the same mistakes of the past, but not to place onto a new love the blame of another. You must overcome your fear that the same mistakes will happen.

With a new love comes a new opportunity, a new chance, for you are starting with someone new someone different, who may not carry the same baggage, if at all, as the one you left.

Denying the fear you may feel from the past and opening up your eyes, minds and hearts to start anew is the only way you can ensure a successful new beginning.

A new beau doesn’t want to hear about old boyfriends on the first date or even within the first month. Wait until asked to bring up flames from the past and at all costs do not go into detail about the sexual prowess of a former lover. If you want the current relationship to succeed, then the guy you’re with is the best you’ve ever had. At least as far as he knows.

We can learn from the past, but are never doomed to repeat it.

Focusing on the present will cultivate a positive future, just as the gardner plants seeds and tends them daily, the expectation for a fruitful harvest in the future is ensured.

To admit a problem is halfway to solving it. So if you can really look at yourself, your life through unbiased eyes, you may find that there is some work to be done. “Get ‘er done!” Whether it be through counseling, group therapy, whatever, heal the damaged good in you so you may have the right thing to offer the right person.